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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29988057">Unworthy</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/allandnothing82/pseuds/allandnothing82'>allandnothing82</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Naruto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Haruno Sakura Deserves Better, Light Angst, One Shot, POV Haruno Sakura, kakashi is an angsty shit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 18:13:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,482</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29988057</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/allandnothing82/pseuds/allandnothing82</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Sasuke has gone too far and Sakura has had enough. Wallowing in self-pity, Kakashi comes along to help her gather herself and remind her who she is.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Haruno Sakura/Hatake Kakashi, Haruno Sakura/Uchiha Sasuke</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>47</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Unworthy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“I can’t keep doing this Sasuke. Naruto hears more from you than I do. You come back once, maybe twice every two months. I’m so tired and,” she took a shaky breath as she let the last words slip out, “and lonely.” She didn’t dare look up at his face. She knew what she would find there. She had found time and time before when she had brought up these concerns in the past few months of their two-year relationship. A look of love, of longing, then of resilience in his task.</p>
<p>	“Sakura,” his deep voice pleaded. She finally looked up and saw what she expected. It was all she thought she ever needed. His soft looks, his eyes, dark and warm, and taut lips which turned to a subtle smile when he looked at her. It took her until this long to learn that she needed more, wanted more. “You know I have to redeem myself. I have to do it alone. You don’t need redemption.”</p>
<p>	“I need you with me,” she argued, but she had said this all before. It was a Sisyphean task to get him to stay and she was done rolling that rock up the hill. She took a deep breath and lowered her gaze. “I hope it is worth losing me.” She felt him flinch at her statement but out of the corner of her eye, his face gave away nothing.</p>
<p>	“I see,” Sasuke started lifting his hand and catching Sakura’s chin, forcing him to look at her. She was quickly stuck in his gaze as he said, “I love you.”</p>
<p>	She could feel the tears whelming as the feeling of devotion and love rose within her. “I love you too,” another shaky breath, “but I need more.” Then, for the first time in their relationship, Sakura walked away from him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>	Four days later and she had yet to emerge from her home except to work, and even that was becoming an enormous task. To try and put on her normal happy, smiling face was too much work when all she wanted to do was cry and look over her pictures of herself and Sasuke. She felt weak and alone, just like when she was younger. Every time she left the house she saw happy couples to the left and right of her, Naruto and Hinata, Shizune and Genma. She was just thankful Ino was gone on a mission or else she knew she would be bombarded with her and whoever she was seeing that week. </p>
<p>She loved being in a relationship, having someone who would listen to her day and love her. Her and Sasuke’s relationship was picture perfect for the first eight months and that was all she could think of now. Him, in the village, spending almost every night together curled up on her couch. Her reading over a report or book and him doing research of his own. Them meeting up with the rest of Team Seven giving each other looks when Naruto said something stupid, and his small smile when Sakura would hit Sai over the head when he said something annoyingly socially hurtful. Her saying that she loved him only two months in, and that thrill when he finally said it back five months later. </p>
<p>It took much probing but he finally told her about his feelings with their youth, his anger, resentment of her and her ‘normal’ family, his shame. She felt like there was nothing they couldn’t overcome. Until he was approved to go on missions outside the village and he quickly disappeared on her. It started small, a week here and there. Then two weeks, a month. Sakura didn’t take as many missions outside the village anymore, as soon-to-be head of the hospital, she was spending most days training under Tsunade about the running of the hospital, but she occasionally left herself which made their meetings even more sporadic.</p>
<p>She confronted him only three months ago for the first time about the lack of time and connection she felt. They hadn’t seen each other in two and a half months. His formerly frequent letters slowed, from once every week to every other, down to once a month. He told her he would try to stick around more but never did. When she asked Tsunade about his mission requests, she found he had actually asked for longer and longer missions. She was in such a rage, training field four had to be closed for a month after the damage she had done. She wrote to Sasuke after drinking one too many sakes with Ino, who of course told her she was being treated like shit and deserved more, filled with her anger. It was a nasty letter and the morning after she sent it she cried for an hour. But he came back that week, they talked, and he promised to stay in the village more again. Another broken promise. This last time, she knew it was over. She couldn’t take the feeling of loneliness in her relationship, the thought of a future with him but actually without him. She knew something had to change, but she had held up the idea that it would be him for too long.</p>
<p>But now she was alone, again, and this time it felt worse because it was a close on the only door to love she had ever known. She was laying in her bathtub as this thought crossed her mind and more tears flowed down her cheeks when she heard the door knock. Automatically she tried to stop her crying and reduced it to whimpers and shook her head at herself, she had been so caught up in her own head she hadn’t even felt a person at the door. What a great ninja she was, she thought to herself, this is probably why Sasuke didn’t want her coming on his missions, she would just hold him back, again. She rose from her position, grabbing her bathrobe which she thankfully remembered and wrapping it around herself, and sliding into her slippers. Shuffling to her front door, she managed to quell her remaining whimpers as she said, “Who's there?” Flinching at how weak and sad her own voice sounded she waited for a response.</p>
<p>“Well just your favorite sensei, can you let an old man in?” Kakashi questioned from the other side. Sakura sighed and opened her door, seeing the familiar shape of her old sensei fill her doorway. He was as he had always been, in his standard jonin uniform, mask in place, but a curious look in his eye made her turn away aware of how she probably looked right now. Like a failure, a voice in the back of her head crept up. </p>
<p>“Well you haven’t been my favorite sensei since I was thirteen but sure,” she tried to play off casually, turning to start boiling some water for tea as he took off his shoes. </p>
<p>“Ah, Sakura, you hurt my heart. You know you have always been my favorite student right?” she heard him tease as he slipped on his pair of house slippers that resided next to Ino’s, Naruto’s, Sasuke’s, and Sai’s. “You are the only one that hasn’t been an idiot.”</p>
<p>“High praise,” she coughed, not much in the mood for humor or teasing. She was in the mood for Kakashi to get out of her house and let her succumb to her angsty emotions. </p>
<p>She took down her cups and got the sugar out when she heard him say, “I was in Tsunadme’s office when he asked for his next assignment. A year or longer?” he questioned. Sakura froze, not expecting to hear such a direct question from Kakashi. They had been friends for years now, the dynamic of sensei and student left behind to her teens. In the past year specifically, they had been together more than she could remember. He would request her for missions where a medic was needed and spar with her when he was in town. She was now the official water-er of Mr. Ukki and would make sure he had fresh food when he came back from long missions. She now considered him one of her closest friends, and from knowing how many friends Kakashi had, she was sure he felt the same.</p>
<p> But she often felt he still was as evasive and emotionally closed off as ever. Hell, she had still only been to his place a handful of times, mostly to either drop off his broken ass from a mission or his drunk ass home from a bar. Sakura was the one who would talk about her life between them. She would tell him about work, how annoying it was to beg the Counsel for money for the hospital, Ino’s new boy plans, and her ever-changing theories on poison work the more and more she did it. She was the one asking how he was and annoying him to open up. This was not a conversation she had been expecting and she felt her cheeks burn from embarrassment.</p>
<p>Without looking back she said as calmly as she could, “Yes, he just said he needed one more long mission before heading back to me.” She couldn’t force herself to smile through the lie but tried to make her voice sound cheery. She heard him sigh behind her but said nothing. She finished up their tea, mint for her with two spoons of sugar and green for him. Steeling herself, she turned with both cups and placed his in front of him at her table, and sat there herself. </p>
<p>She finally looked up, forcing a smile on her face, “I know you were probably just wondering but everything is fine. No problems here.” Her voice faltered on the word here but her smile never wavered. </p>
<p>“Hm,” Kakashi hummed and took a drink of his tea. She drank her tea as well, avoiding eye contact with the man. After a few moments paced she heard Kakashi speak again, “You know you don’t have to lie. He was the one who messed it up, he was a shit boyfriend.”</p>
<p>Sakura’s cheeks flamed and she set down her teacup with too much force, the table shook under her fist. “Sasuke was not a shit boyfriend! He is smart and kind, and loving! And you have no right to come into my house and insult him!” She didn’t know where this strong defense came from, I mean she had just broken up with him a few days ago but she stood by it. She stood up from her seat and shot Kakashi with her hardest glare. He merely looked up at her with a look of confirmation as her head reeled. She said, was not, she said boyfriend in the past tense.</p>
<p>“Oh really, would a wonderful boyfriend leave his girlfriend for months at a time? When he has the option to? Would he ignore her?” Kakashi challenged his own voice growing harder. Sakura didn’t know where this anger was coming from in him but she was not going to have it.</p>
<p>“No but he does have to, he said it himself. You just don’t understand,” she countered softer. She watched as Kakashi stood himself and stalked over to her with speed. He tore her arms apart from their crossed position, which Sakura allowed, and wrapped his arms around her. She froze momentarily. He had never hugged her without her surprising him into it before. Slowly she moved her arms to wrap around him and felt her resolve slowly melt and her breath hitch. His embrace was warm and solid, smelling like the forests around the village, and she instantly felt comforted. She couldn’t stop the tear from flowing and although she felt Kakashi tense when she let out a gasp for air, he didn’t let go. </p>
<p>She rested her head on his chest and turned to sob, “I just tried so hard. I gave him everything but he still left. I just don’t know what to do.” She cried even harder when she felt Kakashi’s hand rub her back with calming long strokes. It took a few minutes but she finally calmed down enough to let go of Kakashi and take control of her breathing. He placed a hand on her shoulder and moved her to her couch. Sakura sat, and saw him start to boil more water in her kitchen. She felt so emotionally exhausted and couldn’t even think, so she just focused on breathing without crying. She shifted when she felt Kakashi’s weight on the couch next to her and looked up into his dark grey eye. </p>
<p>He looked at her with an earnestness she had never seen before and said, “Sakura, you deserve so much. You are the most intelligent, strongest woman I have ever met. You are hardworking and caring. If Sasuke couldn’t see that, then it was his mistake,” Kakashi dropped his head slightly, making himself eye level with Sakura, “You deserve someone who will treat you well.” Sakura’s blush formed instantly at his words as she stammered a thanks, looking away. Being Kakashi, she knew his words were genuine and she had never received a compliment like that from him before. She felt a warmth pool through her body with his words. Suddenly a messenger bird tapped at her window. She stood to let it in but Kakashi stood before her and moved to it. "It's probably for me anyways. I told Genma I would meet him at the bar over an hour and a half ago," Kakashi laughed.</p>
<p>"You will have to tell him you were lost on the way of life, summoned to comfort a damsel in distress," Sakura joked, her mood lifted from Kakashi's visit.</p>
<p>Kakashi turned and faced Sakura with a faint smile she could see behind his mask, "You? In distress? Never." He moved back in front of her coffee table and lower his voice with an edge of seriousness, "But just in case, you know where to find me."</p>
<p> With that, he handed her another cup of tea, how she likes it, and made his way to her front door. She watched him as he left, putting back on his shoes and after opening the door said, “Well, I will be in town this week, so sparing tomorrow?”</p>
<p>"I'll be there, and thank you Kakashi. For everything," she said, smiling for real in the first time since she last saw Sasuke. It felt weird, after being stuck in a seemingly permanent distressed state, but good. He moved out the front door without a sound, closing it behind him.</p>
<p>As Kakashi walked home, his hands behind his head, thankful that his mask hid his blushing face from Sakura's grand smile, all bright and for him, during his visit, he muttered to himself, “Deserve better than either of us idiots.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey everyone! This is my first piece of fanfiction since I was like 13, so it is a little rough (FYI). I love kakasaku and will hopefully be posting more in the future. Hope you enjoy it! Thanks!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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